Tonight I am sad. My 13 year old daughter has not responded to any of my texts on ooVoo the last few days. The only time she responded was on Friday night when she had a random question for me about someone I used to date and she got angry because I did not answer the question properly. The truth was, I was scared that her
father – the abusive alienator – was behind the question so I was not sure “how” to answer her question out of fear and anxiety. This is what life has become. I have to question even the simplest of random questions now for fear the abusive alienator is behind them, scheming and plotting. I have been trying to reach my daughter for almost a month now. I know nothing about her life from the last month. Nothing. It hurts me that she does not want to share any of her life with me. That she would rather share it with the abusive alienator and his new wife. She is online all the time so it is not as if she cannot reach out to me. It used to be that way in the past. The first 8 months or so after she was kidnapped out of school – and yes, sweet pea, there IS such a thing as parental kidnapping – she constantly tried to reach out to me and they stopped her and retaliated against her for talking to me, for telling me things, for contacting me and opening up to me. No-one cared. The Judge did not care. The Lawyers did not care because I did not have enough money to fight it in court. The abusive alienator does not have to strong arm her and physically control her anymore (ie: closely monitor her phone calls, IPOD and computer 24/7) as he used to do because after 18 long months of unfettered, severe parental alienation, she is now completely under his control. Sadly, she does not even realize this. She is unaware that she has been completely used as a pawn and manipulated over the past 18 months (slowly, little by little, day by day, insidiously) in order to hurt, abuse and mistreat me. She does not understand her father’s vindictiveness and the level of hate he has towards me. That he would do anything to destroy me – emotionally, physically, financially, spiritually. She appears to have forgotten all of the things that her father – the abusive alienator – and his equally abusive alienating wife has done. To her. To me. In her quest to SURVIVE the kidnapping, retaliation and alienation, she has forgotten or swept under the rug all of the strong arm tactics used by her father and his new wife in the beginning. I could not get any relief or justice through the courts and she sadly gave up after awhile. I don’t blame her one bit. I gave up too. I gave up on this corrupt family court system. But, I will never give up on her. I believe that after awhile it was just much easier for her to go with the abusive alienators flow then try to continue having a relationship with me – the mother who raised her. She has been told numerous lies about me. That I am mentally unstable. That she was not kidnapped. That I left her and don’t care. That if I cared about her, I would have moved back. That I think I am the “victim” when I am not. She has been told all these things by the abusive alienator and his wife, over and over. They don’t have to say these things anymore because she is under their complete control now. So, of course, when the Judge asked her if they had done all of these things, she said NO and my heart broke.
That is the product and end result of unfettered parental alienation over the course of 18 straight months. It is child abuse. She may truly not remember the things they have said and done or she may have just given up. I don’t blame her and I hope she knows that. She is the true victim in all of this. Just a child who has been used and abused by a horribly selfish father, equally selfish grandparents and a corrupt family court system that is driven by the almighty dollar.
The alienators are all delighted that she no longer reaches out to me. They are delighted that they were able to delay and manipulate this entire case over the past 18 months until the point that I had no choice but to give up and walk away. They are happy to have cut her mother out of her life. They are thrilled that the Judge was so cruel to me and totally biased to her father – the abusive alienator – because he is a police officer. My daughter does not know any of this. She does not know that our Judge is so horrid that ABC Action News even published an article on him in the newspaper and online for being completely unprofessional and biased in the court room towards women victims of domestic violence. Treating the victim like the criminal instead of the other way around. She does not know any of this. She thinks her dad has her right now because he is “right” and I am “wrong”. Just as he has told her. I can’t clarify any of that to her because then I would be discussing “court” and I would be in contempt. I can only pray that one day she sees the truth. That she becomes educated on the research that has been done regarding the effects of parental alienation on children. I love you sweet pea, always and no matter what. You are not to blame. I will always be here for you.